Tag: heartbreak
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Relief
In college, I asked you out when I was drunk, the spirits combining with my feeble spirit and engendering a lewd boldness, I never wanted you, but I wanted to possess you. You said yes, but we closed that chapter the next day, never spoke of it again, years later, distressed by prescription but desperate […]
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The whisper and the drizzle
I’ve always dreamt ofliving in the mountainswith you; in a quaint,little cottage with itsfireplace, and high,vaulted ceiling. I’vedreamt of the two dogswe’d own and the longwalks we’d take whenthe mist kisses the pinesand the twilight caressesthe steeple of the oldcathedral with its delicate,orange fingers. But latelywe’ve found ourselves ina cul-de-sac of melancholycircumscribed byramshackle huts,trash bins […]
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Find me again
There’s no point obsessing overwhat’s done, visiting thosehaunted corridors where theghosts of yesterday projectspectral visions into the vastspaces of the mind,what was and who we weredoesn’t matter anymore,those people are gone,replaced by a coupleholding on to the meagre hopethat’s left once illusion fades,taking with it daydreams ofhalcyon days and purple sunsets,of hand-holding and walkingthrough the […]
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Higher love
I don’t buy anything you sayanymore because the wordssound so hollow,the inspiration you giveno longer invigoratesme, it’s like lukewarm, insipidcoffee: weak and powerless,I exist because I think I need to,if there is a place lowerthan depressionwhere a person’s dead thoughhe still breathes, I’m there,empty and lifeless,I wish your dreams for me hadcome true even though […]
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White Castle
When we were younger,you’d always urge me to dreamof a white castle,complete with its keep, battlements,towers, bailey and moat,you’d whisper, beckoning meto find more than a roomreeking of stale cigarettes,you’d speak,asking me to abandon this placeand find more than a lifeplagued with addictions,you’d believe, saying,“One day, you’ll find that castlewith a garden ofhyacinths and shelteryourself […]
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Holding on
A few years ago, I woke up,believing that God had chosenme as a prophet, to purge theworld of iniquity using fire and blood,listening to the voices in my head,a piercing crescendo, hitting afever pitch, I felt myself leavingmy body, I don’t remember muchafter that, except walking onpotholed streets,being chased by mongrels,their teeth like frightening, white,little […]
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Mistakes made
I don’t know what’s morefrightening, that I mademistakes that ruined my life,or that I’d make the samemistakes if given a chanceto do it all again,I’d love her with the samepassion though it killed me,I’d let myriad memoriesof us soften me, change mefrom someone who wagedwar with the world toa person who accepteddefeat with grace,as the […]
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Belief
I’m drinking alone tonight whilethe staccato rainfall outsideincreases in intensity,I hope the liquor burns througheverything and engenders a numbingbliss, my pupils are dilated liketwo cavernous black holesswallowing matter,the antihistamines havedried my throat and lips,I want a pluviophile’s serenity as Iget through the night,peaceful thoughts like thelittle, watery ringletscircumscribing the cobblestones,not a haunting or possession,madness which […]
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Confessional
I want the confessionals I postedon Facebook, erased from people’sminds, I don’t want traces of themlingering, alerting my acquaintancesto a mad man who shamelesslytore himself apart, flayed himselfalive with exposed secrets anddark desires. They all know the sameguilt, I know, but I’d rather hideit like they do with pictures ofsunset-clad, blue-watered Venicewhere the boats whisper […]
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We
I don’t know whenwe fell out of love.Did it gradually happenlike a candle melting,or did it suddenly occurlike a glass plateslipping from a waiter’s fingersand shattering into pieces?I remember when we walkedunder crisp Autumn’s canopy,driven by a raw lust for life.Maybe it’s that veryidealism that killed us.Maybe we woke up one nightand realised that though […]
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